diff --git a/src/content/blog/0004-fear.md b/src/content/blog/0004-fear.md new file mode 100644 index 0000000..fd24b0b --- /dev/null +++ b/src/content/blog/0004-fear.md @@ -0,0 +1,42 @@ ++++ +slug = "fear" +title = "On fear" +date = "2025-01-22" +[taxonomies] +Tags = ["Life", "Transgender", "Politics"] ++++ + +I'm afraid, and I don't know what to do about it. + + + +I don't even know what to write here. +I don't have any big insights. +But I am scared. +I'm scared for all the trans people in the US. +I'm scared for all the immigrants in the US. + +I feel bad about it, but what I'm most scared of is that the clusterfuck that is happening in the US will come over to Belgium. +And I'm privileged as fuck. +I have a good-paying job, friends and family who support me, an appartment I own. +But I'm still scared. +People around me seem to be mostly coping with the current events through multiple layers of sarcasm and irony. +I try to play along, but I can't do it. +Things feel too momentous and too fucked to do it. + +History teaches that popular opinion can change quickly. +I don't know what to do to make sure that it doesn't turn against people like me. +I'm trans. +I'm also less and less out about it. +At my previous job, I was out and proud at work. +But I still don't feel comfortable coming out at my current one. +I'm not out at the Red Cross instance I volunteer at. +The only thing I can think of to do my part in preventing the popular opinion change I'm scared about is being more and more out. +But I'm afraid to come out. +I probably shouldn't be. +But I am. + +The ramble above probably won't help. +There are no conclusions here. +But I needed to get this off my chest. +At least this feeling is out there now.